October 28, 2013

For Better and For Worse


When I go through perfectly edited blog posts and see nicely done family photos, I start to think that some couples have it all together. Their kids look great on Christmas cards and their Instagram accounts are just a mile-high pile of perfect corners of their house. How do they seem to have it all and I have a snotty infant and a messy kitchen? 

First I got jealous but then I got real. We only show what we want on this little space and paint the image we want others to see. It goes with everything from clothes to children to bedtime stands. Yes, great images and perfect posts help build following and people may PINterest the heck out of your images but that's not real you they see. They see a version of you, and usually it's the best version. 

I, for one, don't have it all together. There are times when I feel discouraged by the smallest following ever, feel angry at my husband for not being a bit more sensitive and run out of patience with my son. We are far from perfect and that's something I want to share

We started as any couple - full of dreams, hopes and aspirations. I really thought that we were different than everybody else, that our story was special and the love we had would keep the fire burning forever.          But I was naive, young and very wrong. 
Fire will not keep burning unless you keep putting firewood into it. If you keep burning on the first love logs, soon the fire will die and you will be left with nothing but cold coils. 

Behind every outfit, lovely smile, and baby picture there is always a story.

The cute pictures of Jonathan at the park have a less then perfect behind the scenes story. 
We started the day off with nice family breakfast and as I was cleaning up, hubby went outside to rake leaves. The weather was gorgeous and I thought we could go for a nice walk. I asked him, and he said, later. Fine. Later it is. (I probably had a little bit of attitude there)

I thought we would go the park near by, take some pictures of Jonathan, enjoy the warmth of the autumn sun and just hang out as a family. My husband on the other hand, thought that I meant walk around the neighborhood. So we were bickering and getting impatient about who said what, and in the process, I forgot to grab diapers and a bottle for Jonathan

Then, of course, I had to do my make-up and hair and was taking a little longer than he thought was appropriate amount of time to get ready to go to the park. 
(We have very different ideas about time limits, apparently)
As we got into the car and drove off, I realized that the stroller was still in the garage, as I took Jonathan for a walk the day before. We had to turn around and go back for the stroller, as husband reminded me about my absentmindedness yet again.
Needless to say, by the time we got to the park, we were in less than pleasant mood. 

But those are the times when it takes some work. 
It takes a calm and gentle voice of one person to bring the other one back into the good place. To remind yourselves, that everything is OK and the most important part is that you are together. 
I have to admit, it's not easy. Sometimes, I fail at being gentle and calm and blow up like a hot air balloon. Other times, I'm full of love and good intentions and nothing seems to bother me. 

Life is full of those moments. But it's the ability to learn, to moved passed it, to enjoy life in every way, to laugh at the weird parts and to forgive each other for the mistakes. I'm still working on that.
After all, we sighed up for better and for worse.



2 comments :

  1. Yes!! Real life means better AND worse--and I have a feeling that just about anyone who's ever taken family pictures (especially with small children) knows that the family doesn't always feel so picture-perfect at the moment though they might look it. My youngest sister is nearly 7....I think our next family picture might be a pleasant affair...but when everyone was younger, it was not so much!

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  2. Just found this link up. Great idea. Incidentally, I just started sharing a little bit of what I learnt in church or in general in my Monday blog posts.
    k at www.beautystyleandgrowth.blogspot.com

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